THE LAST PAGE HE TORE OUT WAS MINE

Itโ€™s weird seeing my grandfather read in public.

He always told us books were private thingsโ€””like prayers or bank accounts,” heโ€™d say. But there he was, in that cafรฉ near Rue de Montreuil, calmly flipping pages like nothing had happened.

I hadnโ€™t seen him since Christmas. Not after what I found tucked in the back of my momโ€™s closet.

A letter. Addressed to him, in her handwriting.

It was dated three weeks before I was born.

And it began with:
โ€œI donโ€™t care if you keep pretending to be my father, but you donโ€™t get to name him.โ€

I waited an hour before walking in. Ordered a cherry soda. Sat two tables away and watched his eyes move across the lines, like none of them were lies.

Then I noticed the book.

It wasnโ€™t just any book. It was the exact same copy he gave me when I turned fifteen.

The same torn dust jacket. The same dog-eared pages.

And then I saw it. The page heโ€™d left open, the corner of the paper folding over just slightlyโ€”like heโ€™d done hundreds of times before. I had memorized that fold, the one that never quite fit back in place after all the times Iโ€™d read the chapter over and over. I could almost hear his voice reading it aloud. The book was a part of our history, our familyโ€™s secret.

I couldnโ€™t resist anymore.

I stood up, paid for my soda, and walked over.

He looked up from the book when I stood in front of him. There was no shock in his eyes, no real surprise, just that calm I had come to know too well. The kind of calm that said, “I know youโ€™re here, and I know why.”

“Do you want it back?” he asked, his voice low. His fingers lingered on the edge of the page, as if he was deciding whether to keep reading or give me the chance to speak.

โ€œNo. I just wanted to see it. One last time,โ€ I said, my voice sounding thinner than I intended.

He smiled then, a small, understanding smile that didnโ€™t quite meet his eyes.

โ€œI thought Iโ€™d been waiting for you. I guess I was wrong. Youโ€™re here now, though. What did you want to ask me?โ€

I wanted to ask everything. But what came out was, โ€œDid you ever tell her you knew?โ€

He didnโ€™t look surprised. In fact, his expression softened, like he had expected this. His finger traced the edge of the page slowly, as though it was something precious to him, something far older than the book itself.

โ€œNo. I never told her. I thought sheโ€™d tell you one day. But she never did.โ€

His words hit me harder than I expected. They confirmed everything I had feared, everything I had hoped to avoid. That letter… the truth had been right in front of me all along, but I hadnโ€™t wanted to believe it. My grandfather, the man I looked up to, was the one who had been hiding the most from me.

โ€œI always thought you were the good guy, Grandpa,โ€ I whispered, barely able to form the words. โ€œI thought you were my hero.โ€

He let out a slow, deep breath, setting the book down in front of him. โ€œI am still your hero, kid. But heroes have flaws. Big ones.โ€

I wanted to shout. I wanted to call him a liar, to scream about how everything had changed. But I couldnโ€™t. My chest felt too tight to do anything except sit there, stunned, while he continued.

โ€œYouโ€™re not the first person to think that. You know, when I first met your grandmother, she told me the same thing. She thought I was the hero of her story, the one who could save her from whatever she was running from. But I didnโ€™t save her. I only complicated things.โ€

I took a deep breath and looked out the window. The cafรฉ was quiet now, just the clink of cups and forks as a soft hum of conversation filled the air. The street outside seemed far removed from the emotional whirlwind swirling around me.

โ€œSo, what was it? What happened between you two?โ€

His fingers gripped the edges of the book tightly now, as if the words were starting to slip out faster than he could control. โ€œI wasnโ€™t the man she needed me to be. But thatโ€™s a story for another time. You need to know the truth about what happened with your mom. Thatโ€™s what matters now.โ€

The weight of the conversation settled into my bones. I wasnโ€™t sure if I was ready to hear whatever truth he had been carrying all these years. But I needed to know. I had to know what had been kept from me.

He sighed again, almost like the air was too heavy for him to breathe, and finally, his voice dropped low. โ€œThe letter you foundโ€ฆ it was written when your mom found out about something I did. Something I should have never let happen. I told her, years ago, that Iโ€™d do anything for her, that Iโ€™d protect her from all the things in life that could hurt her. But I didnโ€™t protect her from myself.โ€

I could hear his words, but they didnโ€™t fully register. My heart was pounding in my chest, trying to piece everything together, but the pieces were scattered and didnโ€™t fit.

โ€œI didnโ€™t tell her who your real father was. I thought if I kept pretending to be him, that I could fix things. I thought if I could be that father, Iโ€™d be the one she could count on. But thatโ€™s not how it works, is it?โ€ His voice broke, just for a moment. โ€œThe truth always finds a way out.โ€

I couldnโ€™t speak. My throat felt like it was closing up, and the lump in my chest grew larger with each word.

โ€œSo, what did she do?โ€ I managed to ask, my voice barely above a whisper.

He leaned forward, eyes locked with mine, and for the first time in years, I saw something I hadnโ€™t expected: regret. Real, raw regret. โ€œShe left. She left me, but not because I wasnโ€™t your father. She left because I failed her in every way that mattered. And for years, I thought I could fix that. But I couldnโ€™t. And by the time I figured that out, she was already gone.โ€

I felt the floor beneath me shift, like my world was tilting in a way that didnโ€™t make sense. The man I had spent my life admiring, the one who taught me to love books and stories and honesty, had been living with a lie all this time.

โ€œI never wanted to be a villain in your life. But I guess I am one,โ€ he said quietly, staring down at the book in front of him.

โ€œNo, Grandpa,โ€ I said quickly, feeling a sense of clarity I hadnโ€™t felt before. โ€œYouโ€™re not a villain. Youโ€™re just… human. You made a mistake, but youโ€™re still here, still trying to make things right.โ€

He raised an eyebrow, surprised at my words. โ€œIโ€™m not sure you understand what Iโ€™m saying.โ€

โ€œI do. I understand more than you think,โ€ I said, taking a deep breath. โ€œYou didnโ€™t protect mom from the truth. But I think itโ€™s time I started forgiving you. Maybe… just maybe, thatโ€™s the first step for me, too.โ€

His face softened then, as though he was hearing the words he hadnโ€™t expected. He reached for my hand, the one that was still resting on the table, and for the first time in a long while, I felt the weight of the past beginning to lift.

โ€œIโ€™m sorry,โ€ he whispered.

I smiled, the kind of smile that felt like the world was beginning to shift back into place. โ€œMe too, Grandpa. Me too.โ€

We sat there in silence for a long time, the cafรฉ around us fading into the background. And in that silence, something unspoken passed between us. The truth was heavy, but it was also freeing. It was messy, but it was real.

โ€œI think itโ€™s time we both move on, donโ€™t you?โ€ he asked quietly.

I nodded, and for the first time in years, I didnโ€™t feel like I was chasing a truth that wasnโ€™t mine. The past couldnโ€™t be changed, but it could be accepted.

โ€œI think so,โ€ I said, finally feeling the weight of that moment lift.

As I walked out of the cafรฉ, the crisp autumn air filled my lungs. The world didnโ€™t look so dark anymore. I didnโ€™t know what would come next, but for the first time, I wasnโ€™t running from it. I was walking toward it, hand in hand with the truth.

Sometimes, the hardest thing to do isnโ€™t confronting the pastโ€”itโ€™s accepting it.