Dealing with Unreasonable In-laws
When my mother-in-law handed me an envelope at our anniversary party, I expected a sweet gesture or maybe some snarky coupons. Instead, I found a shocking bill demanding compensation for raising my husband. What I did next was something she didn’t see coming.
So, I’ve always had a rocky relationship with my mother-in-law, but what she did this time was totally uncalled for. I’m sure none of you have experienced something so absurd.
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Dealing with an Overbearing Mother-in-law
My MIL, Laura, is one of those people who thinks she’s always right. No matter the topic, she insists on sharing her opinion, even when she has absolutely no clue what she’s talking about.
Kitchen hacks? She’s going to give you a list of things you’ve never heard before.
Current affairs? Oh, she’s going to make you feel like you’ve been living under a rock.
Artificial intelligence? Scientific discoveries? That woman thinks she knows it all.
She also likes to believe she’s the best mother in the world. Laura has two sons, Edward and Michael. The younger one, Edward, is my husband.
Ask Edward about his mother, and he’ll give you five reasons why she’s far from being the best mother.
“She always used to scream at us for no reason,” he told me one day. “She would punish us for the tiniest of mistakes and make us feel like we didn’t deserve to be loved.”
Honestly, I feel terrible for Edward and Michael, and I can vouch that Edward isn’t exaggerating about his mother. When I first met Edward in college, he was an underconfident guy, too shy to even talk to the girls in his class.
I’m not one to brag, but I was the one who taught him how to take care of himself and made him believe he was worthy of love.
I still remember the time he shared his traumatic childhood memories with me before we got married. I was shocked.
Unbelievable Request on Our Anniversary
“I remember shaking with fear when Mom used to argue with Dad in front of us,” Edward told me. “She used to scream at us after that.”
“That sounds terrible, babe,” I shook my head. “I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that.”
“I just want you to know what kind of childhood I had,” he said, looking straight into my eyes. “It’s important for me to be honest before you decide to start a new chapter of your life with me, Ray.”
“I know, Edward,” I said as I reached for his hand. “You don’t have to worry about anything now. I’m with you, and I’ll stay. I’ll stay forever.”
That’s when I decided to marry the man I loved the most, but I never imagined his mother would turn my life into a nightmare. I knew she was difficult, but what she did a few weeks ago was beyond anything I expected.
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Unexpected Surprise on Our Anniversary
It was our second wedding anniversary, so Edward and I decided to host a small party at our house. We invited our close friends, my parents, Edward’s brother, and my MIL.
I spent hours decorating the house and cooking up the best dishes for the celebration. I even ordered a beautiful anniversary cake that was so gorgeous I almost didn’t want to cut it!
Anyway, so the guests started coming in and everything was going well.
They chatted, enjoyed the food, played games, and thanked us for inviting them. Then, once everyone left, my MIL called me into the living room and handed me an envelope.
“What’s this?” I asked with a smile.
“Just a little gift from my side,” she said as she stood up to leave. “It’s only for you, okay? It’s not for my son.”
“Oh, thank you,” I said in a cheerful tone.
Then, she hugged Edward and me and left with a smile on her face.
“That’s strange,” I said to Edward once she left. “Your mom didn’t make any mean remarks today. I’m surprised!”
“Oh, she might have spared you because it’s our anniversary,” Edward laughed.
“By the way, what’s that?” he asked while pointing towards the envelope in my hand.
“Your mother said it’s a gift for me,” I said. “It better be something nice.”
“For you?” Edward chuckled. “You’re one lucky woman, Ray!”
Once we finished cleaning the kitchen, I sat on the bed with the envelope, ready to open it.
“I’m opening your mom’s gift!” I called out to Edward who was in the shower.
“Good luck, babe!” I heard his muffled voice from behind the bathroom door.
I expected a few dollar bills or grocery store coupons inside the envelope, but what Laura had given me was something far beyond my expectations. My smile faded as I pulled out a piece of paper from the envelope.
When I unfolded it and read the first line, I couldn’t help but stare at the paper with my eyes wide open. My mother-in-law had sent me a bill for all the “expenses” she claimed to have incurred while raising my husband. I’m not even kidding.
Here’s a snippet of the list she sent:
- Diapers — $2,500
- School supplies — $1,200
- Sports equipment — $1,100
- College tuition — $25,000
- Emotional support (yes, this was actually listed) — $10,000
- “Nurturing a loving son for you” — priceless (with a smiley face)
The list went on and on, and the more I read, the more my eyes twitched. She even added a little note at the end.
“Since you’re enjoying the benefits, you can help me recover the costs.”
“What the heck?” I said to myself. “How could she even think of doing this? She’s asking me to pay her for raising such a wonderful husband?”
That’s when Edward stepped out of the bathroom.
“What happened, babe?” he asked after looking at my face. “Is everything alright?”
“Your mother needs help, Edward,” I handed the bill to him. “Serious help.”
I watched Edward read the bill carefully, expecting him to react like I did, but he just brushed it off as a joke.
“I’m sure Mom’s just playing around,” he chuckled. “She can’t be serious.”
“She sent me a bill totaling $50,000, and you think this is a joke?” I said, my tone serious.
Edward shrugged his shoulders.
“Laura and I aren’t high school buddies,” I said, rolling my eyes. “I know she’s serious. You know how she loves making people feel terrible. This is just another one of her stunts, I’m sure.”
That’s when Edward agreed with me.
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“I won’t let her get away with this,” I told Edward. “This is just… absurd!”
Once we went to bed, Edward fell asleep in a few minutes, but I kept tossing and turning, thinking about how to get back at Laura in the best possible way.
I wanted to make her feel as terrible as she made me feel today.
How did she even think of asking me to pay her back for all that stuff? I thought. How did she even think she was emotionally supporting her children when all she did was yell at them?
The next morning, I woke up with a brilliant plan. After breakfast, I grabbed a notebook and started listing everything Laura had put me through.
Then, I made an itemized bill, just like the one she sent me. I even called my bank and asked them to send me a statement of the money I had spent in therapy during the last two years.
I made a fake invoice with an outstanding balance of $5,000 and mailed it to her. I even attached a short note with it for her reference. It said:
“Dear Laura, Here’s a list of all the things you put me through during the past two years. Since you enjoyed passing insulting comments and making me feel horrible, you might as well help me recover the costs. Your loving daughter-in-law, Ray”
Sending that envelope felt incredibly relieving because it was the first time I stood up for myself, hoping it would set a boundary in our relationship.
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I’m not one to disrespect or hurt others, but what Laura did on our anniversary was unacceptable. This felt like the best way to make her realize her mistake.
And you know what the best part is? She’s been unusually quiet since the day she got the mail. I thought she’d call and scream at me, but all I got was silence.
When I saw her a few days later, she couldn’t even meet my eyes. It looked like she was embarrassed by what she’d done, and I count that as a victory. I guess she finally learned she’s not ALWAYS right!
I’m so glad I finally stood up for myself. But more than that, I think I did it for Edward. The little boy from 20 years ago who never got the love and care he deserved.
I hope, in some way, this makes up for all the harsh words and hurtful moments he endured. He deserved so much better, and I’m proud to have fought for both of us.
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Do you think I did the right thing?